Mar
11
“Who you are is speaking so loudly that I can’t hear what you’re saying.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Dan Senf
Jan
27
“Most of life is routine – dull and grubby, but routine is the momentum that keeps a man going. If you wait for inspiration you’ll be standing on the corner after the parade is a mile down the street.”
Ben Nicholas
Oct
19
Self-Deception
The capacity for self-deception
The human heart has unlimited capacity to hide the truth from itself if the truth is too painful. That is our capacity for self-deception; it’s possible to know something and not really know it because if we did know it, it would be too painful for us to handle.
Self-deception is not the worst thing you can do, but it’s the means by which we do the worst things.
The structure of self-deception
What does self-deception look like practically speaking? Here are three examples.
- There have been occasions when either my wife or I have asked my father-in-law about a certain noise we hear from the car. He knows cars very well and has lots of experience with them. His initial answer is almost always the same: just turn the radio up and that noise will go away. This is an outworking of self-deception. I know, but I don’t want to know because to truly know would be too painful to bear.
- Father has son who is a terrific athlete. Everywhere he goes he one of the best athletes at each school. But everywhere they go, inevitably his son gets accused of stealing. So the father, in school after school, ends up storming into the principal’s office accusing the other kids of being jealous of his son because he is such a gifted athlete. Yet at home, the father has all his valuables locked up. He knows, but he doesn’t know because he doesn’t want to know. The truth would be too painful for him to bear. Defensiveness is often a sign of self-deception.
- At the end of WWII, the first city the Allied forces entered containing a concentration camp, was the town of Ohrdruf. When the Nazi guards found out the Allied forces were on their way, they dug up some 2000 graves in order to incinerate the bodies to destroy the evidence. They had these bodies stacked by the dozens. Do you know who was leading this group of soldiers into Ohrdruf? General George Patton who was as tough and rough as they come. Patton came to the camp and saw the bodies stacked up. He promptly vomited. He interviewed the surviving prisoners in this camp and the prisoners reported that every night the guards would go into town drink, brag, and womanize. The prisoners had the impression the whole town knew about what was going on. So Patton called the whole town including the mayor and his wife to the camp to dig graves for the bodies. Upon completing their assigned duties the mayor and his wife went home and hung themselves. And they left a note saying, “We didn’t know, but we knew.” (Tim Keller)
We have an enormous capacity to hide from ourselves truth that is painful to us. But what happens if we can’t hide from that truth? What happens if that truth gets out into the open and then we have to deal with it?
When faced with the harsh reality of a truth too painful for us to deal with, we will trot out our performances in an attempt to cover up the truth that gives us a black eye.
The solution to self-deception
Why are certain truths too painful for us to accept? Which ones are painful and why do we hide from them?
If you get your sense of value and worth through parenting then you will not be able to handle the truth of a disobedient even rebellious child. Your child will never do anything wrong in your eyes, because you won’t be able to handle the truth if they did something wrong. Your whole sense of value and worth hangs on your kids being good and if they’re not, you’ll hide from that truth because it will be too painful to handle.
If you get your sense of value and worth from people you will find yourself very sensitive to criticism. If somebody says something even the slightest bit critical of you, you will either go on a seek and destroy mission or you will disassociate from that individual.
But if God, through Christ Jesus, is how you know you are great – if you know God honors you; if you truly know just how much God values you – then you can handle bad news about anything because it doesn’t change you at your core.
Is that where we get our sense of value and worth? If it is, self-deception is defeated.
(Taken from a teaching by Pastor Brian Dainsberg - Appleton Alliance Church, Appleton, Wisconsin. Visit www.appletonalliance.com
Sep
3
Starbucks with friends is always better than Starbucks without friends.
Aug
23
When things are right, they go right and when not, problems persist.
Getting it right in life is a life-long effort.
“I have been impressed with the urgency of doing. Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Being willing is not enough; we must do.”
Leonardo da Vinci (via minimalmac)
Aug
22
Sengata to Balikpapan is the best 6-hour roller coaster I have been on.
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